Thursday, February 19, 2015

Life Stages, Cliques and just life.

Rant Ahead

I have been thinking on life stages when it comes to friends and cliques lately.  As my oldest is getting ready to graduate high school and get into the workforce.  And my youngest is almost 11 so he will be leaving the nest in about 7 years.  It will be interesting for me as right now most of my friends are from my homeschool co-op and they have children that are younger than my youngest so they will be there longer than me. So I am in an odd stage of life when it comes to friends.  When I am outside of co-op or church most people rarely talk to me. I know part of it is that I don't have the money to go to all the events they do, my husband works nights so most women I know do things together during the day so that they don't take away from time with their spouses which is fine but for me during the day is when I spend time with my husband.  Plus I work part-time besides homeschool.  So friends are hard for me to come by.

 Its sad how our society dictates age groups.  Most people don't think I am old enough to have an 18 year old (I am 37) so that catches peoples attention so that puts some people on the edge of not being sure about me. Then a lot of the people I graduated from high school with have younger children than I have or are just starting their families, so that makes it odd also.  Before you say put yourself out there to be a friend I am an introvert so that is hard for me to do.  Plus since I have always been on the odd side of life most people don't like to be around me.  I have never fit into any group but why should I have to as groups divide people.   Also I have been burned so many times by people just being nice to my face and then I actually hear them making fun of me or talking bad about me or my family behind my back.  And yes I am talking Christian women sometimes their cattiness is worse than any others.  I don't fit the  stereotypical, crafty, latest style type homeschool Christian mom.  Seriously on the fashion note I am wearing a biker leather jacket I got from a pawn shop and sometimes with studded cuff bracelet I got from the Goodwill, so not considered the normal Christian homeschool mom style. I can be blunt, the Lord has worked with me on this one trust me I am not as blunt as I used to be, I am still a work in progress.  So where do I go from here in this stage of my life for friends?  I am thankful for my husband and my best friend that I have had since high school they take me for who I am not what others think I should be.  But how many other women out there like me who don't have a spouse or at least one good friend.  They still crave fellowship with others just like I do.  I just wish women would be more open to friends that are different from their normal group.    We should not as adult women act like the high school cliques still exist (which is funny since even in high school I did not fit in completely with any cliques the only one that really kinda of let me in the most was the stoners even though I was not a drug user or a drinker.)  Especially Christian women cliques should not exist yes we can have close friends but not exclude others just cause they are different or in a different place in their walk with Jesus. Are we as Christian women showing John 13:35" By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another." or are we just showing love to "loveable" people in our lives or to the "unlovable & loveable" non-believers.  But not showing love to the "non loveable" believers that we personally know.  We need to show love to all. 

Thank you for reading my rant.

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